Beyond the Mask Read online

  Beyond the mask

  By Sharron McKinlay

  This story is dedicated to my daughter, Jo. Of all the stories that I have written this has always been her favourite. Though I wrote it a number of years ago it is through her encouragement and belief in me as a writer that prompted me to go ahead and publish it.

  © Sharron McKinlay 2014

  Published by Sharron McKinlay

  ISBN 978-0-473-32584-8

  All rights reserved.

  Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be produced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the author.

  Acknowledgements:

  I thank my wonderful family for all the help and support given in the writing of this book.

  I thank my husband Angus for his never-ending support and my daughter Jo who encouraged me to get this book published.

  I thank my brother Don for doing such a great job of proofreading and my son-in law for David for editing the work ready for publication.

  I thank my grandson Ben for the great design cover of the book. I am so blessed to have such a talented family member to do this for me.

  This story and all of the characters are entirely fictional.

  Contents

  Prologue 1

  Chapter One 4

  Chapter Two 10

  Chapter Three 18

  Chapter Four 28

  Chapter Five 40

  Chapter Six 47

  Chapter Seven 60

  Chapter Eight 67

  Chapter Nine 73

  Chapter Ten 89

  Chapter Eleven 92

  Chapter Twelve 97

  Chapter Thirteen 103

  Chapter Fourteen 106

  Chapter Fifteen 109

  Chapter Sixteen 113

  Chapter Seventeen 117

  Chapter Eighteen 125

  Chapter Nineteen 134

  Epilogue

  Beyond the Mask

  PROLOGUE

  “ I’ve finally figured out what to do with my life, Alisha.” I pushed myself up from the table to make room for my friend to sit and read the email on my laptop. She scanned it quickly.

  “What! What’s this got to do with you?” Her voice was abrupt but she showed concern in her hazel eyes. I was not going to let her talk me out of my new life.

  “Exactly what it says. I’ve been accepted for the position and I’m leaving in 3 weeks for good, Alisha.”

  “But Kim, you can’t. You just can’t rush off to the North Island to a place you’ve never been to before and ...”

  “I’m going. I’m not asking your permission. I know what you’ll say and I’m not going to change my mind. I have to aim at something for my life. This is what’s come up.”

  Alisha looked at me then she read the e-mail again slowly and out loud.

  “You’ve already met Nicholas Seerdon!” she exclaimed. “You never told me.”

  “Look, Lish I’ll be ok. Yes I’ve met him. He likes me, I like him and he’s chosen me out of all the applicants. He was here on business last week. We met at a cafe in Christchurch.”

  “But you didn’t tell me. I’ve never known you to take a risk in the thirteen years I’ve known you. You’ve always been so, so sensible.”

  “Well that’s been the trouble,” I snapped. I spilt the coffee I was drinking over my skirt as I spoke and without thinking, swore. Alisha looked at me in amazement. She had rarely heard me swear.

  “What’s going on in that head of yours? This is just not you.” She stood up and grabbed the dish cloth from the nearby sink and dabbed at my skirt with the cloth as she spoke.

  “You’re always so sensible.”

  “Well that’s got me nowhere.” I took the dishcloth from her hand and rubbed at my skirt a couple of times before flinging the cloth back on the sink. “You’re now talking to the new Miss Kimberley Oborn, housekeeper extraordinaire, working for the most handsome man in the whole wide world at ‘Glen Fern’ homestead and stables no less, in the Taranaki, in the North Island in New.....Zealand.” I burst into laughter when I saw my dear friend’s face. I hoped she wouldn’t guess I was on the edge of hysteria.

  “Oh come on, Alisha. It’s not the end of the world. We’ll keep in touch and I’m sure once I’m established there you can come and stay. Will you take me to the airport when I go?”

  “Of course I will. But I’m scared for you.”

  “Don’t be. It’s my life and I’ve got to do something with it. I’ve been in a hole long enough.”

  Chapter One

  I glanced at the map again and slowed the rental car right down to determine how far away the turn off was. How I wished I’d hired a GPS to go with the car but I was generally pretty good at following a map. I stopped at the side of the road and traced the map with my fingers. Satisfied with my calculations I put the car back into drive and soon picked up speed again. I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax.

  Nicholas Seerdon had no idea what kind of person I was and I would have to be careful not to let on how insecure and fearful I really felt. I had been really good at acting at school and when I’d met Nicholas for the interview at the cafe I’d acted confidently. I was sure he was convinced that I was what I’d portrayed myself to be; level headed, secure and sure of myself, independent and willing to work hard. Well I guess a couple of those things were true. I’d always been level headed and willing to work hard. The rest was an act.

  I’d flown into Wellington Airport and picked up the rental car at twelve noon. I left for the Taranaki immediately and now I shivered as I had another glimpse of Mt Taranaki covered with snow. Not far to go now.

  I finally found the turn-off I’d been looking for. The road became quite narrow and I knew I was nearly there. Homes were few and far between and at last I found the sign I’d been looking for: Glen Fern Stables. I turned into the long twisting driveway that led to the homestead. Taking deep breaths to calm myself down I noticed the gardens and grounds were immaculate. When I reached the homestead I stopped the car and sat back staring at it for some time. It was huge. It looked like an old English Country home.

  I pulled the sun visor down and looked into the small mirror and pushed back a stray auburn curl that had escaped from being caught up in a dignified bun. The bun was meant to give me confidence but it wasn’t working. I was scared. As I finally plucked up courage to get out of the car I felt incredibly dwarfed by the size of the imposing homestead.

  I was five foot three and slim but standing there in front of this huge homestead I felt truly insignificant. The dark shrubbery surrounding the home looked dark and uninviting. I wanted to get back in the car and drive away. Every instinct within me told me to leave now but I ignored the clambering fear and pulled my three large suitcases out of the rental car and placed them on the ground. I took a deep breath and began to pull them along as I walked, leaving the largest one there beside the car. I climbed the wide stairs leading up to the main entrance. I put the suitcases down, took another deep breath and knocked.

  As the sound of the door bell faded away I could hear footsteps. It seemed to take forever before the door opened and a tall, thin woman, who looked to be in her sixties stood there with a look on her face that did nothing for my courage.

  “Yes. What do you want?”

  “I’m Kimberley Oborn. I’ve been hired by Mr Seerdon to help with the housekeeping.”

  “Oh.” Her voice was icy cold. “Come in then. Mr Seerdon will be here shortly. I will show you to your room. Follow me.”

  It was a command and not a request so I picked up my
suitcases and stepped into the huge entrance hallway. I barely had time to glance at my surroundings as the woman, who I presumed was the housekeeper, led me up the long dark hallway until we reached a staircase. I had been pulling my suitcases along but had to pick them up to climb the narrow stairs and it was difficult. She didn’t slow down and I was afraid of losing her and not knowing where to go. When I reached the landing upstairs she was waiting. Without a word she led me into another dark corridor and then finally into a huge bedroom.

  “I’ll call you when Mr Seerdon arrives,” she said, then abruptly left me alone.

  “Thank you,” I called after her. For what? I thought to myself as I rubbed at my tired shoulders and arms. Now what? I was bone weary after the trip but keyed up as well.

  I looked around the large bedroom. It had a king sized bed in the room and the drapes at the large windows were a deep rich crimson velvet. There was a lightness to this room that I liked after seeing the huge imposing entrance hall and the dark hallways. The double wardrobe doors were open and ready to receive my worldly goods so I began to unpack my suitcases. I’d almost finished when there was a knock at my open door.

  “Welcome to Glen Fern, Kimberley.” He put the suitcase I’d left at the car down in front of the wardrobe. The smile was friendly and he held out his hand to shake mine in a firm grip. His features were strong and handsome. There was no weakness in his face and his eyes were so dark it was hard to read the expressions in them. My hand shook and I was hoping he wouldn’t notice.

  “I’ve asked Mrs Williams to make us a hot drink. You’ll be tired after your trip I suspect. So when you’re ready come downstairs and we can discuss your future here in more detail. Come out this door and turn right, then first right at the stairs. When you’re downstairs turn right into the hallway then first left where you’ll find the dining room. You’ll soon find your way around.” He paused. “I’ll sort out the rental car and get it returned.” He smiled again and left the room. I washed in the luxurious ensuite and changed into a clean skirt and fresh emerald green top that I knew suited me and followed his directions downstairs.

  The dining room was huge and sunny and I sank down into one of the comfortable lazy boy chairs at Mr Seerdon’s direction and tried to listen carefully to all of his instructions about my new job.

  “Ah, Janet, thank you.” I hadn’t heard her footsteps and the tray she carried though filled with food and good china hadn’t made a sound. Nicholas took the tray from her and placed it on the large coffee table. “You’ve met Kimberley, our new housekeeper haven’t you? Kimberley will take over the running of the day to day housekeeping. You’ll still be in sole charge of the kitchen and meals as you wished Janet. You will get a much earned rest.”

  I could see Janet purse her lips with disapproval as he spoke and the picture became clearer to me. She did not want me here at all. She wanted things to be the same as they had always been. She was the one person who could help me learn how things were done here but I figured I’d have my work cut out for me. This woman would never want to help me. I was relieved when she left the room and Mr Seerdon waited until she’d gone before he spoke to me again.

  “Janet has been living here all my life. She was my nanny when I was growing up and became my housekeeper. She’s very angry at me for hiring you and I’m aware at first there will be difficulties. So you’re on your own really. I have made it clear to her that she is to give you any information to help you learn the ropes. However, you seem to be a sensible young woman and I’m sure you’ll have this place functioning perfectly in no time. If Janet is not very helpful I suggest you glean the info you need from the woman who has been coming in once a week to help out. Mrs Parmentor will be here Mondays and will continue to come so that you can have Mondays off and be free to do your own thing. Janet is getting too old to do this job, Kimberley. Though she’s angry at my decision to bring you on staff she will live out the rest of her years here at Glen Fern and it will be best for her health. When the kitchen becomes too much for her I will have another battle on my hands.” He stood up. “When you’ve finished your tea I’ll take you on a quick tour of the house so you won’t get lost.”

  It was clear to me that he was in a hurry so I left my half finished cup of tea on the table and stood up to let him know I was ready. I still didn’t listen to the fear that kept rising up in me. Telling myself off for it and pretending I was composed and sure of myself, I went from room to room following the master of the house.

  Chapter Two

  The months passed quickly. I found the running of the homestead a challenge. I was great at organising but found all the cleaning work involved rather boring. There was always plenty to do but I didn’t find the work particularly fulfilling.

  Mrs Parmentor turned out to be a major blessing. She more than made up for the coldness and deep resentment that Janet Williams had towards me.

  I’d met the gardener on my day off. When I walked around the gardens enjoying the fresh air I always returned to the house feeling better. During my working hours I was almost always indoors. I felt rather trapped without a vehicle of my own but Nicholas allowed me to use the Range Rover once a fortnight to do the shopping.

  I was rather isolated and lonely and found myself looking forward to seeing Nicholas when and if he came in for the evening meal to have some company. Janet Williams never ate with me if he was not there and would bring a tray to my room. I missed Alisha something shocking but we emailed regularly and I didn’t tell her how I was really feeling because I didn’t want her to worry. In the last two weeks I’d found myself weeping a lot when I was left to my own devices in my room.

  One night my old nightmares returned. Exactly the same as they’d been after the horrific accident. I sat up in bed panting with fear. When it subsided I lay down again, breathing deeply until I gained the courage to get up and change into a dry nightie. I could feel the sweat dripping down my back. After a time I sat listlessly on the bed and tried to stop the memory of the nightmare that gripped me. The trouble was that the nightmare had really happened and the memories flooded back as if it had happened yesterday and I tried to stifle my sobs so no-one would hear me.

  I missed them so much. Pictures of what my wedding day was going to be would flash through my mind: Don, my fiancé, leaving to pick Mum and Dad up from the airport; his final kiss goodbye. That was the last time I saw him alive, and the last time I saw my parents, my beloved parents. They were excited about the wedding that would never take place. The knock on the door, the police … I couldn’t remember the rest. The funeral was a blur and my life changed forever.

  After a long time the pain and the grief subsided. I guessed that coming here to a strange place where I had no friends and nothing familiar around me had brought back the haunting nightmares. Maybe coming here away from my only support, Alisha, had been a stupid thing to do but I would give it time. I had a new life here. Yes I was unfulfilled in it but I worked hard and kept busy and I was used to isolation. I was young and I had my whole life ahead of me. One day I would do something exciting with my life. Hadn’t I proved I could take a risk? I could hardly believe I was here at Glen Fern at times.

  I checked my alarm clock and saw it was just after 2am. I was wide awake now and thoughts of going back to sleep scared me in case the nightmare returned. I hadn’t seen the accident but in my nightmare I saw it vividly and I couldn’t shake the fear of it so I switched on my bedroom lamp and tried to read.

  The homestead was so old it creaked a lot at night, especially at this time of year when the days were hot and the nights cool. Every creak disturbed me. I wanted to run away but I had nowhere to go. Alisha had new flatmates and a new man in her life. I had no choice. I was at Glen Fern to stay.

  Monday, was my day off. I would have liked to sleep in, for on a normal working day I rose at six and finished my work at five. It was a long night. I could not get back to sleep so at 4am I put on my light creamy dressing gown and tiptoed out into the
corridor.

  I’d never before ventured any further than the toilet in my ensuite at night and at every creak I made I flinched. How come Mrs Williams could materialise silently from nowhere when she was around? I was sure the noises I was making would wake the dead.

  I switched on the lights at the head of the stairs and made my way slowly downstairs. I switched on the hall light and felt like I was an intruder. I had never been welcome in the kitchen. That was Mrs Williams’ domain and I had rarely seen it. I reached the kitchen, put the light on and found the kettle. A hot cup of Milo was what I wanted. I sat at the table and surveyed the kitchen while I waited for the kettle to boil.

  The kitchen had been redecorated with every imaginable modern convenience and yet it retained the integrity of the house. It was cream and light. The only two rooms in the whole of Glen Fern that I’d seen that didn’t have the dark wood panelling were this room and the large sunny dining room where we had our meals when Nicholas was home.

  “What are you doing?” I jumped in fright and was almost relieved to see Mrs Williams standing there.

  “I couldn’t sleep. I just came downstairs to get a cup of Milo.”

  She pulled her long chenille dressing-gown tightly around her thin frame. “You disturbed me.”

  “I’m sorry Mrs Williams. I tried to be very quiet.” She ignored me and picked up the kettle. She poured it into my Milo and handed the cup to me. If I had been on my own I would have sat here and drunk it slowly and I would also have added a teaspoon of sugar but I was no longer inclined to stick around.

  “I will clean up here,” she said as if I’d trashed her immaculate kitchen and I thanked her, took my cup and went back upstairs where I was obviously meant to be at this time of night. As I reached the top of the stairs I was startled by Nicholas. He’d been about to come downstairs and I collided with him.